Sunday, September 12, 2010

Guy In Coffee Shop Fails to Attract Attention After 5 Hour Stay

Wellington West - The guy who is frequently seen at the popular coffee shop "Bridgehead" once again failed to attract any female attention after a record 5 hour stay at his corner table. Hoping to at least garner a passing smile or acknowledgement of his trendy yoga bag, the mid-thirties Government worker says he will not give up and will return tomorrow to surf the net and drink lattes at the busy coffee shop.

Introducing himself only as "Gary", hopes are high to attract attention tomorrow when he plans to bring even more intellectually stimulating props, such as novels by obscure Russian authors, an organic knapsack from Machu Picchu, and a bamboo briefcase. "It's just a matter of time before an equally interesting person will ask to borrow my extra chair or the orgnaic honey I bring from home and display on my table." Gary mused. Most customers that frequent the shop are similarily equipped at tables throughout the premises, but none are as committed to their stay as Gary who usually sits at his table for up to 4 hours at a time.

Of particular interest is the fact that Gary has high speed internet access at his recently purchased one bedroom condo down the street, but prefers the louder, more ambient atmosphere of Bridgehead to check emails, post blogs and book GAP adventure trips. "Why would I want to work undisturbed at home when I can come here and take up table space while I sip my one latte for 5 hours?" Gary explained.

Plans to return tomorrow may have to be put on hold for the time being since a massive 5 wheeled stroller was crushed into the coffee shop by an over-zealous new mother whose designer sunglasses impaired her vision, spilling organic milk onto Gary's laptop rendering it inoperative. "That's ok, at least I can still use it as a prop even if doesn't work and just read my Latvian Screen Writers Guidebook instead." remarked Gary.


  1. Gary + lululemon logo clearly displayed on piece of clothing or nearby prop = Wellington West chick magnet.

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  3. Is that lady who killed his laptop gonna buy him a new one or is there gonna be a rush on water proofing laptops as we can't leave home w out em?!