Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Sandy McTire Backs New Budget After Tories Announce Canadian Tire Money Now Official Currency

Ottawa- Well known retail personality, Sandy McTire from the Canadian Tire Corporation fully endorsed the new federal budget announced today, holding a press conference urging Canadians to do the same. Known for his fiscal prudence and year round savings on quality merchandise, McTire made it clear that he supports the Conservatives new federal budget. His announcement came on the heels of Finance Minister Jim Flaherty formally endorsing the use of Canadian Tire money as a form of Canadian currency nationwide, bringing McTire a whole new level of fiscal stature. Distributed previously at all retail store locations in denominations of 5, 10, 25, 50 cent bills as well as a one dollar bill, the CTC bills are now officially accepted as common currency nationwide effective June 10, 2011. McTire also feels many Canadians are "tired" of the political games between parties, hoping an election does not take place as predicted. McTire expressed his disinterest in holding yet another election, which will disrupt the lives of all citizens of Canada, and bring an already tedious view of federal politics to a dangerously volatile level. "The wee lads and lasses out there are not liking this constant election fodder." McTire explained. "Aye, we just want to get on with enjoying our lives and going to places like Canadian Tire on a Saturday mornin' and pinching some savings out of a new patio set or the like." McTire remarked in front of a packed media frenzy.

Famous nation wide for his jovial and thrifty attitude towards Canadian retail purchases, McTire was pleased to see the new budget addressed reducing the deficit within five years and savings for middle class citizens who frequent his retail stores. He hopes other Canadians will also see the benefits of Flaherty's budget announced earlier today. Usually keeping out of the political limelight, McTire felt it necessary to step up and make his Scottish lilted voice heard in the House Of Commons today as the opposition parties shot down the new budget and catapulted the country towards a spring election campaign that could begin within days.

"Me thinks those other lads, Mr. Moustachio, EyeBrow Iggy and that Bug Eyed French Fry are just causing a ruckus over this budget to rattle some sabres, and me thinks most Canadians are just wanting this damn winter to be over with so we can down a few pints on a patio or wash our cars without them getting dirty again after ten minutes." McTire exclaimed before heading back to CTC Headquarters where he resumed work on his goal of making Canadian Tire money a globally traded commodity.

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