Monday, March 14, 2011

Cereal Personalties Jailed After Drunken Brawl Downtown



Ottawa - The annual Cereal Mascot Conference held this week in Ottawa turned violent after an altercation between characters which resulted in six arrests and three persons being sent to hospital. Held annually to bring the multitude of usually happy, upbeat cereal personalties together to discuss the future of breakfast cereals, things took a turn for the worst when the conference happened to fall on St. Patrick's Day, resulting in an over indulgence of alcohol at the Westin Hotel where the conference took place.

Police report a very belligerent character, "Lucky The Leprechaun" from Lucky Charms cereal started to bad mouth Snap, Krackle and Pop, from Rice Krispies after they were overheard commenting on the provocative appearance of the SunMaid Raisin Girl. Words were exchanged and cereal personalties began to choose sides, resulting in a heated rivalry. With Cap'n Crunch, Tony the Tiger, Toucan Sam and the Honey Smacks Frog joining Lucky Charms, an opposing force of characters joined Snap, Krackle and Pop. HoneyNut Bee, the dopey but strong Sugar Crisp Bear and the older but still wise Cinnamon Toast Crunch Chefs aided Snap, Krackle and Pop in an all out brawl that resulted in six arrests and sent three to hospital with non-life threatening injuries.

Police are continuing their investigation but have charged Lucky the Leprechaun with public drunkenness and vomiting soggy Frosted Lucky Charms onto a police cruiser. It was later reported the SunMaid Raisin Girl who started the whole altercation was seen leaving the hotel with Count Chocula.

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