Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Mechanicsville Residents Trade In Ten Speeds For More Beer-Run Efficient E-Bikes


Mechanicsville - The warm weather has created a surge in bike use across the city, and Mechanicsville is no exception. Sunshine and clear roads usually produce an increase of residents grabbing their old ten speed bikes with upturned handle bars to go get a two-four of beer, but more recently, the trusty ten-speed beer transport has given way to the more efficient "e-bike".

Requiring no licence or insurance, these electric powered scooters are all the rage in Mechanicsville where residents are trading in their ten speeds for this new form of transport. Donning cut off jean shorts, residents eagerly hop on their new e-bikes to cruise the streets. "I like it cause I can fit a two-four on the back no problem." says Mechanicville resident Dwayne Hutcher, who used to ride a ten-speed bike. "Before I'd have to balance the two-four on the handlebars, which could get crazy if I wanted to stop suddenly for a smoke." Hutcher commented.

Sales of the new e-bikes have sky-rocketed since the warm weather has hit the region, with local retailer "E-Z-Streets" selling upwards of ten e-bikes a day. "We usually sell 2 a month in th e winter, but with the warm weather and word spreading about how great these e-bikes, are, we are selling 10 a day" exclaimed E-Z-Street manager Wayne Lowper. "We give good trade-in value for their ten-speeds, so I think that helps too." Lowper remarked.

Local police are not so thrilled about the increae of e-bikes in the neighbourhood however, as they can cause traffic problems. "We had one guy with 3 cases of beer stacked on his e-bike and the thing was pretty unbalanced. He stopped suddenly and toppled over into a parked Camaro, injuring the driver who happened to have his T-Top roof off." explains Constable Harry Richards. Possible "e-bike gangs" are also a concern that could use the machines for criminal activity. "We could see a rise in gang activity between the e-bikes and the Hells Angels." Constable Richards explains. "Rivalry could get fierce."

1 comment:

  1. Holy fuck, bro. I'm dying here. That's some funny shit, and I'm stealing your photo. I'm glad I stopped though, because this post made my night. I'll credit and link back to you. Thanks again.

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